Financial Concerns and Family Planning?

Hello! This is Natalie. Just a few small items of business:
First, Thanks so much for visiting! My mom and I have been gushing to each other all weekend about the comments you've left, the nice things you've written on your blogs, and just the number of people who have taken an interest in this site. It really makes us happy, so thanks!
Second, We have a whole slew of questions/answers to post, so we will be posting all of them today.
And Finally, we will probably start posting "Letters From Jane" about once a week. We're thinking question/answers on Mondays, Letters on Fridays...but we'll just see how it goes.

Now on to more important matters...

The Question:

My question is about finances. At the present time we only have two children and I am wanting very badly to have a third (all 2 years apart). However, the economy being what it is, my husband's company has no plans for up-grading (he is a pilot) in any near future. He took college classes as long as he could, but now this summer we are facing THE STUDENT LOANS. It cost a lot to be a pilot and the looming debt feels like it is about to crush us. Usually pilots are only first officers at a regional airline for a couple years but we are well into year 3 and like I said, he still has 800 people above him before he can become a captain.

We bought a duplex two years ago since we knew things would be tight (the loan officer actually said, "Well, you'll make more money eventually, right?" haha). I don't mind living here - it is small but not as small as it could be - but even with that, we barely make ends meet. If it weren't for tax return season, we'd be sunk. I often feel torn about doing something like child care to earn extra money, but I feel like my hands are full as it is - then add another child of our own (which I want so badly)...

What is the balance between faith and using your own judgment? When he makes captain it will double our income and that is just in the first year so I don't want to limit our family when I know things will get better... Some day. What were some of your experiences in this area as you added children to your life? And what are some of your tips for budgeting/money managing? Do you have any recipes or food ideas you would share that have helped stretch your dollar?

Thanks as always,

Rachael

The Answer:

Dear Rachael,

This, I'm sure, is going to sound very irresponsible, but we never considered finances when having our family. It just didn't factor in. We paid for our first couple of children with student loans! For some, we had great insurance, for others, we scrimped by. When we had four children, we went back to school for a PhD and lived in a basement apartment for a while (and had another baby). We had an agenda--having a family--and we just moved ahead with it. Things always worked out. We've taken criticism for this over the years, but I think that when you're sure of yourself, when you really know what you want, and when you have a sense of purpose about your life from an eternal perspective, you can weather all the obstacles.

Little children don't really know when things are tight. Their needs are so simple and their satisfaction so easy to achieve. By the time we were making a good living and bought our first home, we had five children. We've gone on with financial ups and downs over the years. When we've had the money, we've taken some wonderful vacations, when we haven't, we've gone camping. The money end of things has always been my husband's worry. Mine was creating happiness out of whatever we had.

We often shopped at thrift stores and garage sales. It's a fun family activity and my daughters have become geniuses at finding wonderful things for almost nothing.

I cook from scratch. Over the years, I've developed a system of grocery shopping that saves a great deal. I keep a stock of all the basics which I replenish when they go on sale. So the only things I usually buy weekly, are dairy and fruits & vegetables that are in season (and therefore cheaper). And if one of my staples-- for example sugar or chicken breasts-- is on sale, I stock up. When I make out a weekly menu, it only includes dairy products, fresh produce and a few random items like tortillas or hamburger buns. So I'm always paying the minimum for everything and I'm accumulating a good, usable food storage at the same time.

I keep a three ring binder with my family-tested recipes on full pages, by category in page protectors. That way, I never have to go hunting for that pancake or french bread recipe. It encourages me to cook inexpensively. Those are some of my practical ideas.

Of course, everyone must consider their own situation and chart their own course. But this is my story. And I want to assure you that if you want a child and are feeling the urge to have one, you can. I wish you all the best in this important decision.

All my love,

Jane